I have learned that grief is a tough place to be. You feel like you are trapped between 2 worlds. You are not quite living in the now, and you can't go back to what once was. It feels like there is so much pressure placed on you to just hurry up and get over it. People don't like to see people sad so they think the best way to help you is just to tell you to quit grieving. Get over it, or get on with life. Its not that simple. They mean well but they just don't get it sometimes.
If you lost someone or something that had deep meaning to you, you know that getting over is just isn't going to happen. The sadness creeps in and you just can't seem to shake it sometimes.
There is hope though. You can learn to live your life to the fullest again. You can even learn to love and enjoy it. Just remember that it does take time.
I was so deep in my grief that I couldn't even see what was happening around me. I couldn't see that path of destruction I was on. It was a slippery slope and the further along it I walked, the steeper it became. I would occasionally reach out and try to grab on to something so I wouldn't slip all the way, but inevitably it happened. I lost my footing and down I went.
I needed to learn to avoid the pitfalls of further grief or loss. I went in to treatment and they taught me that I needed to live in the moment. In the here and now, not in the past which I couldn't change, and not in the future where things had not yet happened. I just needed someone to point me in the right direction, to throw me a rope and help drag me out of the pit of despair I found myself in.
I am learning that grief, especially that of a loved one who you are very close to, hurts so bad, but that they wouldn't want us to stop living. They would want us to live our lives and to truly love the people we have here. This doesn't mean to forget our loved ones who have gone home to be with the Lord, but to live a life with the people who are still here with us. It is a challenge and is very difficult when that wound is fresh, but I am so thankful that I am starting to see, and live my life to its fullest.
Take the time you need to grieve, otherwise that wound doesn't truly heal, but don't forget you are still here. Don't let yourself get caught up in feeling guilty for living, loving and enjoying the life God has given you. Do it in your own time. Don't rush it, but remember that your loved one would truly want you to live, laugh, love and enjoy your life. Remember that they were happy when you were happy while they were here and that they would still want that joy in your life now.
It might be sad sometimes to make those new memories without your loved one being here, but the loved ones who are still in your life need those memories. And whether you realize it or not, so do you. We are never guaranteed tomorrow because we only have today, but God wants us to be wise in the moments He has blessed us with. To live in the right here, right now.
Its going to take time, and It is very difficult at times, but take baby steps to get back into your life. Enjoy your loved ones. Create a new normal for yourself. Fulfill His calling in your life and you will never regret it. And Laugh, don't forget to laugh. It is so healing when you do.
"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; He rescues those who are crushed in spirit." Psalms 34:18.
God bless your day.
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