May 1, 2019. Happy May day.
So it has nearly been a year since I have written. Boy life has gotten busy and I have not written on my blog. I have continued to journal so what I am going to write today will be from a journal writing from last year and the one I wrote again recently following surgery.
Yes I said surgery. This girl finally decided that in order to better care for others, she had to take care of herself. It was a rough surgery, there were some minor complications, but the Lord pulled me through it and recovery is taking place as I write.
In March of last year, I wrote in my personal journal about waiting on the Lord. I am well aware that patience is not one of my better virtues. I figure out what I want to do, or where I want to be, and than I proceed to want it right then and there. Funny thing is, patience is just what the Lord is making be learn through this surgery and recovery period.
So this year, my journal had the same theme, so I titled it, "Wait again". I found myself in a place where I needed to wait on the Lord and trust in the process taking place. Ugh, the whole patience thing again. I think God is trying to make it one of my better virtues possibly.
I feel like I trust God and his plan for my life, but patience is such a challenge for me. I feel I need the answer now, to know the outcome even before something has taken place. I feel out of control when this doesn't happens, and out of control feels icky to me. But I am learning that when I am not in control, God is. This is real trust, and something I am learning through the healing process.
Doing this means having faith, and faith means trusting whether I know the outcome or not. I must trust that the outcome will be just what God has planned and that He knows what my life needs, and will provide. He does not want me walking in fear, but in that faith that I proclaim to have.
Through some of the difficulties I have had since surgery, I found myself looking things up on the internet. This really wasn't wise as it opened me up to even more fear than faith. Did you know, the internet is pessimistic? You can type in symptoms or questions about something and its going to give you the worst possible scenarios. I mean really, what better way than this to convince you that your sicker than you are, or worse, your dying.
Instead of thinking I must know everything, I am learning to just rest, wait in the Lord, and trust that his outcomes for my life are better than anything I could think of myself. I read in Ecclesiastes 3:1, "There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven." And in John 16:33 RED LETTER "These things I have spoken to you, so that in me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have over come the world."
In Psalms 27:14 we see the title of this blog in verse. It says, "Wait for the Lord; Be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the Lord." Its so important that we wait for the Lord that the Psalmist writes it twice. Wait, and again wait. Stop trying to figure your life out on your own and before its time. Begin to live life one day at a time.
Seek the Lord when you run into things your unsure about and see if its something He has designed for you to deal with at this time. If not, let it go. When we do this, we can begin to have a life that runs more smoothly instead of thinking that everything has to have an answer or a fix at this exact moment. This will free you up for a more simple, less hectic and less stressful life.
When we wait on the Lord, focus on Him and not the noise of the world, all the chaos that has been our norm begins to lose its power. The world may continue in chaos, but in Him we find peace. Remember, He overcame the world so that we might have peace.
Blessings to you and yours and may Gods peace reign in your life this week.
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